We begin, as these things often do, with Simon practicing to be the Dark Rider he'll eventually be. Handstands on ledges, tumbling on rooftops, bouncing off asphalt…
His skills are growing and so is his confidence in them… so much so that when he hears what sounds like a mugging taking place, he moves towards the danger.
Peter, a young man unburdened with size or strength, gets shoved against a wall by a considerably stronger Mugger demanding his money. Just as helpless Peter is about to surrender his belongings, the Dark Rider drops down from the roof.
To say this is attention-getting is a wee bit of an understatement.
"Who the f--- are you?" the Mugger asks.
"Let him go!" the Dark Rider insists.
Instead of doing as told, however, the Mugger head-butts Dark Rider, beats him down to the ground and grinds his boot into the Rider's hand. Just as it appears that the Rider is finished, the Mugger goes to remove the hero's mask.
Suddenly, Dark Rider plants a kick that sends the Mugger reeling. Gaining the advantage, the Dark Rider delivers blow after blow until the Mugger runs off, defeated.
In the calm aftermath, Peter realizes what's just happened.
"You're a superhero," Peter exclaims, awestruck. He asks the Rider for a photo, but by the time Peter retrieves his phone, the Rider is gone.
Some distance away, the Dark Rider pulls off his mark, revealing an invigorated and adrenalized Simon.
At the Loft, Alisha arrives home to find a blood trail. She follows it to Simon, clumsily attempting to bandage his hand.
"What happened?" she asks.
"Someone stomped my hand," he replies. Only the dreamy smile on his face is that of a boy who's just won a football game. Alisha bandages Simon's hand.
"You could have been seriously hurt." she replies.
"I have to take risks. If I don't take risks, I'll never learn. I'll never be him."
Alisha has had enough of this talk of Simon becoming Future Simon, although he's pretty much Future Simon right now. Alisha knows what's in store for Future Simon and she's not enthused, considering that future Simon buys the farm. She tells him that since she's already saved, Simon should drop the Dark Rider act and just stay in the present. Besides, Simon becoming the Rider means she's essentially getting dumped.
"…and I don't get dumped." she states.
The next day, at the community center, Proby 3 has the newly re-installed ASBO 5 setting up chairs for an event… one they are all ordered to take part in. He walks in with a group of sad-faced youngsters.
"Who are they?" Alisha asks.
"Another bunch of f--k-ups."
Simon recognizes one of them. It's Peter, the lad he saved.
They're participating in what's called, "preventative intervention" or, as Proby 3 puts it, where "you f--k-ups tell these f--k-ups not to f--- up or they'll end up being as big a bunch of f--k-ups as the rest of you."
Peter is picked first to tell the group what his offence was. In order to impress a girl (yeah, I'm buying that one) Peter stole her purse with plans to return it to her as the big hero.
The gang isn't particularly helpful in this scared straight set-up. Nathan, oops, I mean Rudy is daydreaming of chickens, Curtis and Alisha can barely hold back their laughter, Simon's busy trying to hide his bandaged hand and, when finally pressed to scare Peter straight, Kelly simply tells him not to steal handbags anymore.
Intervention achieved.
Later, in the restroom, Peter and Simon are at the urinals doing what people do at urinals. Simon leans over and, in a burst of compassion, tells him that things won't always be the way they are now.
In two seconds, Peter has it figured out.
"You’re the guy in the mask."
A rattled Simon says, "I don't know what you're talking about." Worst. Liar. Ever.
Peter recognizes Simon's voice and that bandaged hand is a dead giveaway. Peter's face lights up like its Christmas morning. He wants to know how Simon became a superhero and invites him out for a beer.
Simon tells him that it's best that the pair forget they've ever met. Before a dejected Peter can protest, Rudy walks in and finds the pair facing each other, still unzipped and, um, hanging out. Assuming things not in evidence, he snickers and walks off.
Outside, Simon tries (and fails) to convince Rudy that they weren't examining each other's wangs. Nathan, I mean Rudy (I gotta stop doing that) makes a sex gesture with his hands and Simon walks off, exasperated.
That night, Peter is in his bedroom drawing comic panels. We watch as he lovingly sketches a character smiling a beatific smile… Simon.
The next day, Peter arrives at the Community Center and finds Simon. Instead of being rattled, this time Simon is happy to see him. He smiles a beatific smile and greets him warmly.
Something is clearly not right.
Outside on the roof, the two chat about Peter's love of superheroes and the hours he's spent drawing them. How they helped stave the depression that comes from a life of loneliness.
"I've always been obsessed with superheroes. Now I've actually met one."
Simon is taken with this description, if a little dubious.
"Most people would think I'm a freak."
"Most people are idiots," Peter replies. "They don't understand what it means to be prepared to die for what you believe in."
"Would you like to be my best friend?" Simon asks out of the freaking blue.
"Great," Peter says
We cut to Peter's bedroom. The comic panels he drew the night before are taped to the wall. We move closer to them, discovering that they depict the scene we just witnessed…
One dialogue balloon, coming from Simon, reads, "Would you like to be my best friend?"
And Peter's response… "Great."
Alisha finds them on the roof and Simon goes to her. She immediately senses that something is off and asks what he's doing.
"I'm talking to Peter."
"Why are you doing that?"
"He's my friend."
That sound she's hearing is called a warning bell.
Later, Simon introduces Peter to the Loft.
"You have a secret lair," Peter exclaims. "That's totally superhero."
With the Dark Rider costume laid out on the bed, Simon explains that he inherited the loft from his future self, which blows Peter's mind. And that's even before Simon, breathlessly, tells the tale of saving Alisha by jumping in front of a bullet.
Peter asks the question all of us Misfit watchers have been asking ourselves.
"Why don't you just wear a bulletproof vest?"
Simon explains the loop. If he doesn't die, Alisha never falls in love with the present Simon. If that doesn't happen, Simon never becomes the Future Simon. If he never becomes the Future Simon, Alisha dies in that warehouse.
Take that, Cloud Atlas!
Peter thinks this is the coolest thing in the world, but he's wrong. The coolest thing is that ice cold look Alisha throws the pair of them when she walks in to find the Dark Rider costume out in the open.
She's furious that Simon has told this stranger all of their secrets. She's furious that Simon thinks of this guy as his friend and she's furious that, when she yells at Peter to leave, he only does so once Simon tells him to go.
And in the elevator ride, it's Peter's turn to be furious.
The next day, Alisha is making breakfast when Simon, all stone-cold and rigid, tells her he has to face his destiny alone.
"Is that before or after your breakfast?" she asks.
"Being a superhero is a heavy burden. I have to terminate our relationship. I've got to sacrifice our love for the greater good."
It starts to dawn on her that he isn't joking. Or in his right mind. She chases after him but he leaves.
And just like before, we see this scene drawn on comic panels on the wall of Peter's room.
Alisha tearfully offers details about the break-up to Kelly, Curtis and Rudy. Rudy, of course, tells Alisha it's because Simon is a proud gay man who likes looking at penises in the bathroom.
"He's not gay," Alisha fires back. "He's the best shag I've ever had."
Oh, honey.
"I'll just pretend I'm not here," Curtis retorts.
Alisha later finds Peter and confronts him, sensing his influence over Simon's behavior. Peter tells her, "Being a superhero and having a girlfriend don't mix. They never have."
"He's not a superhero. He's my boyfriend."
"He was your boyfriend."
That does it. Alisha shoves him against a vending machine, causing Peter's drawing book to fly out of his bag. The book is open to a page filled with drawings of Simon. They both grab for the book at the same time. Alisha succeeds in snatching a single page but it’s a telling one… the page depicts their entire breakfast/break-up conversation. She realizes that Peter's done something to Simon and its related to the comics he's drawing.
Peter snatches the page back and runs off. He goes to his bedroom, panicked about his confrontation. He knows she knows. Or is very close to knowing. He breaks out his sketch book and starts to draw the Dark Rider.
Alisha has gathered Curtis, Rudy and Kelly (interrupting her flirtation with power dealer Seth in the process -- she's none too thrilled about that) to confront Peter.
Cornering him outside of his place, Peter confesses that he has done something to control Simon and break them up, but that he had to.
"It all has to happen," he cryptically tells them.
Before we get what that means, Peter takes off and the gang gives chase. Peter leads them to a wall. He can't escape. The gang catches up with him and threatens to do with him what they've done to others who've absued their powers on them. Open. Can. Whup. A$$.
It doesn't turn out as planned.
The Dark Rider drops down and shields Peter from the gang. Since no one in the ASBO 5, except for Alisha, knows that Simon is the Dark Rider (and Rudy doesn't know the Dark Rider at all), this presents some confusion. Kelly moves in on Peter and is blocked by the Rider. Alisha implores them all to leave, but instead Curtis and Kelly charge forward.
The Rider takes them all out, leaving them crumpled on the pavement -- just as Peter has drawn.
Naturally, when they come to, they are none too happy about getting the crap kicked out of them. Alisha is even more upset. She knows that Peter has Simon under total control.
When Simon doesn't show up for community service the following day, Alisha uses her power to learn that he's with the "wierd kid". Infuriated, the group breaks into Peter's place and, after some trouble with the alarm (best seen to be believed) find his room and all his comic panels on the wall.
"Whatever he draws, it actually happens," Alisha tells them. To stop this, they rip all of the panels.
At the loft, Simon feels the psychic bond rip and collapse.
Later, Alisha arrives at the loft to find a very confused and remorseful Simon. He begs for her to take him back. Alisha explains Peter's power and tells him that it wasn't his fault. Seeing the head wound he inflicted on her, he breaks down and cries. They hold each other, together again.
Peter arrives at his place to find his comic panels shredded on the floor. He is utterly heartbroken.
The next morning, Simon confronts Peter about manipulating him. Peter tells him that he did it so that Simon can become who he has to become.
"Maybe I was wrong," Simon tells him. "I did it to protect her. All I've done is hurt her."
Peter tells him that he knows he can do it, knows that he can be the hero.
"I'm not a superhero," Simon flat out says. "They're a fantasy. Your fantasy. Not mine. I won't ever leave her."
Peter doesn't take this well, as you can imagine.
The next day, Nath -- no, no, no. Rudy is antagonizing Proby 3, Alisha and Simon are wrapped in each others arms and Curtis and Kelly celebrate everything going back to normal. And not one of them knows that watching them at that moment is a new Dark Rider.
Alisha walks home, alone. One would think she's never do that (it typically doesn't end well for her) but there she is. She hears a noise from above. Feels something stalking her. She runs, but is caught by the New Rider.
Simon arrives at the Loft. He calls out for Alisha. No answer. He looks, finds the iconic Vegas photo of him with Alisha taped to a mirror. Above it, an ominous message...
"Come to the warehouse on Tipton Street."
Simon opens his closet door and pulls out his Dark Rider costume and prepares for battle.
At the warehouse, Peter (a.k.a. New Rider) ties Alisha to a chair and gags her.
The Dark Rider climbs walls, jumps the rooftops, and runs like hell to the warehouse. He arrives, finding Alisha tied up. Before he can untie her, New Rider attacks with a longblade, nearly cleaving Dark Rider in half. They battle, each landing blows until the Dark Rider knocks the blade from New Rider's hand. They both struggle to grab the blade.
And suddenly, everything stops. Alisha looks fearful as the two are locked in a still embrace of sorts. Dark Rider steps back, revealing the blade plunged into New Rider.
After untying Alisha, the now unmasked Simon rushes to New Rider, peeling off his mask and finding, to his horror, Peter.
"Why?" Simon asks.
"You did it," Peter tells him as he lay dying. "You saved her. A superhero has to be prepared to die for what he believes in."
Peter dies in his arms. Simon comforts Alisha, who is devastated.
"Seeing that was like watching you die all over again," she confesses. "Why would you want to become that? You stay here with me. You don't have to go back. Promise me you won't go back. Promise me."
"I promise," Simon tells her.
Alisha tells him that she never wants to see the Dark Rider costume again. She wants him to burn it with Peter's body.
As Peter's body burns, Simon lifts the duffel bag with the Dark Rider costume towards the flame. Will he burn it?
Later, Simon returns to the loft and tells her that he did. She turns away, finally at peace. As her back is turned, Simon places the duffel in a hidden compartment behind the locker. His promise to her was something he could never keep. His Destiny something he can no longer deny.
Back at Peter's place, a final arrangement of panels depicting his fight, his death and Simon's choice. His last gift to the superhero.
Next week, Nazi's???
Misfits airs on Logo Friday nights at 10/9c. The on-air episodes are edited for U.S. television. Want to see the show in its original version? (More cussing/nudity.) Unexpurgated season eps are available for viewing online at LogoTV.com!
